So it is official. Tinder is now 78 percent men. Let that sink in for a second. That is not just a little imbalance. That is a full on desert for men and an all you can eat buffet for the top 20 percent of guys. You think that sounds great for women? Not really. You think it sounds remotely good for the average guy? It is a bloodbath.
Now if you have ever wondered why online dating feels so rigged against you this is why.
And I will tell you right now the whole thing made me stop and really think about the future of dating and how matchmaking especially what we do here is more relevant than ever.
How It All Got So Messed Up
Let’s rewind a bit. When Tinder came out it seemed like a cheat code. People were getting dates left and right. It was new fun effective. But like anything that explodes in popularity it collapsed under its own weight.
I was at the Love Conference in New York a while ago and I met this guy who worked with Tinder Hinge Bumble all the major platforms. His company would get hired to audit these apps and find ways to make them more addictive basically. Strip the wheels off figure out how to get people stuck inside forever.
He did a presentation showing how Tinder’s user base has been dropping for years now. Less people are using it but they are still making the same revenue. How? Because they are squeezing every last drop from the guys who are still holding on praying it will work for them. Feeding them hope. Artificial matches. Making them think they have got a chance.
It is not a dating app anymore. It is a casino.
How the Algorithm Really Works
I asked this guy straight up. Is there really an attractiveness algorithm? He said yes. Absolutely. He told me Tinder ranks you based on your behavior. If you are a guy swiping right on everything the system sees you as low value. Desperate. And why would a desperate guy be shown to high value women? He would not.
Men swipe right on nearly half of profiles. Women swipe right on only 8 percent. Let that sink in. Men are swiping on everything just hoping to get one match. And when they do? They only get matched back about 0.6 to 3 percent of the time. That is insane.
And even when they match nearly 50 percent of the time they do not get a reply. And 80 percent of men report being ghosted. So what are we doing here?
Seriously if you designed a system to crush a man’s confidence while dangling just enough hope to keep him addicted you would invent Tinder.
The Female Perspective
Now this is where it gets interesting. We talk to women all the time. And they are just as frustrated. They know Tinder is broken. They are not dumb. But it is like what else is there?
Luba does coaching for women now. And guess what? The ladies are saying the same thing. They match with a guy who looks good on paper but he is not serious. He flakes. He ghosts. He is seeing five other women. Why? Because they are all fighting over the same top tier guys.
And those top tier guys? They have got zero incentive to settle down. Why would they? It is like a conveyor belt of options for them. They are living like kings while everyone else fights over scraps.
This is what happens when you give all the selection power to one gender in an unbalanced environment. It becomes chaos. Tinder gave women the power and it backfired on everyone.
Men swipe right on nearly half of profiles. Women swipe right on only 8 percent. Let that sink in. Men are swiping on everything just hoping to get one match. And when they do? They only get matched back about 0.6 to 3 percent of the time. That is insane.
And even when they match nearly 50 percent of the time they do not get a reply. And 80 percent of men report being ghosted. So what are we doing here?
Seriously if you designed a system to crush a man’s confidence while dangling just enough hope to keep him addicted you would invent Tinder.
The Matchmaking Advantage
Now compare that with matchmaking. In our world it is flipped. The man is the one choosing. The man is the one in demand. And the women we work with? They are actually serious. They are not there to collect validation or waste time. They have opted into something real.
I know some people will argue yeah but Tinder is free. So what? Free does not help if it is a giant waste of your time and dignity.
Matchmaking is intentional. We screen people. We work with women who want to build something real. They are sending photos videos writing and rewriting profiles asking for feedback because they want to attract a good man.
And here is the kicker. Even though they know the man holds the power in matchmaking they are okay with that. Because they are tired of the games. They want family connection normalcy.
That is not happening on the apps. That is happening here.
Supply and Demand
It is basic economics. If women are flooding Tinder and ghosting guys and the guys are starving for attention the women hold the cards.
But with matchmaking the supply and demand shifts. We have thousands of women in our database and not nearly as many men. So what happens? The men get to choose. Just like it always was.
Think about how dating used to work. You met someone through friends family church community. There were social networks and reputations. People vouched for each other. It was not perfect but it worked.
Now? Now you are expected to impress someone with a photo and a three line bio. And then hope you get a match. And if you do maybe they ghost you. And if you actually get a date you hope they are not just using you for a meal or validation.
I know some people will argue yeah but Tinder is free. So what? Free does not help if it is a giant waste of your time and dignity.
Matchmaking is intentional. We screen people. We work with women who want to build something real. They are sending photos videos writing and rewriting profiles asking for feedback because they want to attract a good man.
And here is the kicker. Even though they know the man holds the power in matchmaking they are okay with that. Because they are tired of the games. They want family connection normalcy.
That is not happening on the apps. That is happening here.
The Real Threat Ahead
And let us not forget what is coming down the pipeline. AI girlfriends. Digital companions. Fake people who never argue always support you and know exactly what to say.
Now most people joke about this like oh guys just want sex robots. But the real danger is not the sex. It is the emotional replacement.
Imagine a world where more people prefer AI to real human connection. That is not a science fiction movie anymore. It is becoming real. And it is terrifying.
So what happens when dating apps have failed social media is fake and people start choosing robots over each other?
Simple. We go back to matchmaking.
Because in the end people still want to feel something real. They still want to be understood. And they still want a future with someone who sees them.
And that is why we do what we do.
Final Thoughts
Tinder is not working. The numbers prove it. The frustration is real. Men are stuck swiping endlessly for a fraction of a chance. Women are overwhelmed, confused, and still ending up disappointed. Everyone is losing.
But it does not have to be like that.
What we do with matchmaking is different. We help you take back control of your dating life. We work directly with men who are serious about finding a real relationship, and we guide you through the entire process. From your profile to your mindset to matching you with women who are actually ready for commitment — we are in your corner the whole way.
If you are done wasting time on apps, if you are tired of feeling like you are playing a rigged game, talk to us. Tell us what you want. Let us help you get it. Because once you stop chasing and start building with intention, everything changes.
